Hello perfect description of my in-laws! - Narcissism

I've known that my father-in-law has narcissistic personality disorder for a while now (even if, like almost all those with narcissism, he'll never get diagnosed); however, I'm always shocked at how perfectly descriptions and explanations of narcissistic personality disorder fit him. The sequences of events, my reactions, his reactions, how he has treated my husband and his siblings (even my mother-in-law) and friends/acquaintances and my family too, all fit into narcissism so well it's scary. My husband and I were just talking about how we feel like his father's borderline personality behaviors stem from his overwhelming and very apparent narcissistic personality disorder, whereas his mom simply has borderline and avoidant traits - still not sure if she has a full-blown personality disorder (I would pin her as more avoidant than anything, with spurts of borderline). His brother, on the other hand, is well on his way to having full-out narcissistic personality disorder as well.

Anyway...these links clicked with me regarding my father-in-law...pretty much everything described here fits him to a tee - and a lot of it goes with my brother-in-law, and a little with my mother-in-law too (but her's may be reactions to being married to such an abusive, husband with narcissistic personality disorder all of these years - she's very over-dramatic and attention-seeking [her lies come more in ways to fulfill these two things- over-dramatize and get attention - and it's a lot of lies - pretty much 90-95% of the time she's lying to do this] - who knows...I'm not here to diagnose...just share my thoughts and experiences). My father-in-laws' lies come more in the narcissistic way.

Every little thing, every small detail, everything mentioned on the following pages is my in-laws. And this...is my in-laws:

http://www.halcyon.com/jmashmun/npd/howto.html

http://www.halcyon.com/jmashmun/npd/traits.html

What ever came of him calling her?

In a nut shell, my husband calling his sister was a mistake, and I feel so stupid for ever suggesting it.  What did I think would happen?  By some miracle, she would see that her parents are wrong about me, and she would try to have a somewhat normal relationship with us?  Ugh...basically, they took it as my husband wanting a relationship with them (all of them; not just her, even though she was the only one he called) and I won't let him have one.  They even upped their ways of convincing themselves and her and others of why I won't allow him to have a relationship with them, reiterating me brainwashing him, manipulating him, lying to him and other people, abusing him, and sharing stuff about personality disorders they have diagnosed me with on their own, etc. blah blah blah blah.  All things they do, but they throw on me because I guess it's easier to lie and put things on me than to own up to what they have done and actually try to fix their mistakes, which would also be admitting that their own actions made their son (and me!) want nothing to do with them.  Welp, lesson learned.  Definitely can't try to talk to anyone in that family because they will take it and make it what they want.  And they still attack and bash and gossip and all the other crappy things they have always done.  Hmmppph!